Personal Experience

Back when I lived in Vancouver, there was this job I really wanted, outreach worker with homeless folks. It was everything I’d studied for, dreamed about, the whole stuff you know? And I got it! I was told I would need at least 4 years experience in shelter to get considered for an outreach position, and here I was, 11 months after I started, with an offer. But I was completely screwing it up. I was tired all the fucking time, my brain was mush, and I was letting the wrong coworkers get to me. Forgetting important shit, zoning out at meetings (who doesn't tho), being impatient with people, then just saying, “fuck this,” and lazying through the rest of the day.

It wasn’t because I wasn’t capable. It was because I was staying up until 2 a.m. watching TV or doing random shit around the house. And here’s the worst: I love sleeping. Always have. Go figure. I wasn’t going to bed. I just wasn’t giving myself the chance to actually enjoy it. The more I was getting tired, the more the "bad" coworkers were getting to me, the more I wanted to be done with all that bullshit. Sometimes, I’d smoke weed to "relax," but all it did was make me lazier the next day. I was falling asleep at 2, waking up at 5, and lying in bed staring at the ceiling. No wonder I was burning out.

I finally got tired, ironically, of feeling like that. I told myself, “Alright, 10 p.m. every night. No excuses.” And let me tell you, it was fucking boring. I’m the kind of person who wants fun all the time. Hanging out with friends, watching a killer movie, doing literally anything except going to bed early. But I knew it had to change.

At first, my friends were weird about it, like when someone says they’re not drinking and everyone treats them like a party pooper. But I kept at it. Eventually, some people just faded out of my life. And you know what? I was meh about it. The people who stayed got it—they weren’t making me feel like sugar for taking care of myself.

After a while, something changed. I started waking up without an alarm, feeling mentally sharp even if I wasn’t bouncing out of bed. At work, I stopped letting annoying coworkers mess with me. They became like white noise, and I dealt with them professionally and with way more creativity. I started remembering details, planning ahead, and killing it on the job. I started building such solid relationships with workers from other organisations and that made my job way easier.

One day, I was chatting with Josh, this guy from the welfare office. We’d never really clicked before, but suddenly, we were having these great conversations. I invited him out (strictly as friends), and we had such a great time. Then he told me, “You used to be mean to me.” I felt so embarrassed and shameful. If I hadn’t gotten my shit together, I would’ve missed out on that friendship.

Here’s what I realized: Slow-release pleasure, like going to bed early and waking up ready to tackle the day, is so much better than instant stuff like TV or scrolling on your phone. I didn’t lose my friends. I didn’t miss out on anything important. And the rewards? They were massive.

I didn’t do it every single night. Of course not. Life happens. I’d go to a show or decide I’d “earned” a late night. But those detours didn’t derail me. I always came back. I wanted to be sharp, to be gritty, to be fucking great at my job and go on with my life with a “tralalalala” vibe, not the whiny “meeeeh” that used to define my mornings.

Discipline is so unsexy, but it works. And being great at my dream job was worth every single boring early bedtime.

 

How To Keep It Up

Getting to bed at the same time every night can be tough, but these strategies make it manageable:

• Use your planner! Write down your sleep time as a non-negotiable task for the day. If it’s scheduled, it’ll happen.
• Set an alarm for bedtime, not just waking up. This reminds you to wind down and stick to the schedule.
• Create a pre-sleep ritual. Read, meditate, or write in your planner. Doing the same thing every night trains your brain to expect sleep.
• Reward yourself for sticking to it. Make weekends a treat for late nights or movies, but only if you’ve been consistent during the week.
• Minimize distractions. Turn off your phone or set it to “do not disturb” an hour before bed to avoid doom-scrolling.
• Forgive yourself for the slip-ups. One late night doesn’t mean you’ve failed. Get back on track the next night.
• Track your progress. Use your planner to see how many nights you’ve succeeded. Watching the streak grow can be motivating.

 

Abrasive Truth

Stop telling yourself you don’t have time for sleep because there is a time out with friends, or work to do... You’re not that important, and the world won’t stop spinning if you turn off the TV or leave the party early, or not go. Saying “I’ll just power through” is a load of bullshit, your body doesn’t care how tough you think you are. Sleep isn’t optional, and pretending it is will make you sloppy, cranky, and worse at literally everything you care about. Get over yourself and go to bed, on time.

 

The Facts

• The Impact of Sleep on Cognitive Function: Dr. Matthew Walker discusses how sleep before and after learning enhances memory and performance in both cognitive tasks and physical skills. (LINK)
• Sleep and Mental Health: Professor Daniel Freeman, a clinical psychologist, Professor Freeman explores the relationship between sleep and mental health. His work delves into how regular sleep can enhance emotional stability and reduce stress. (LINK)
• Physical Health Benefits of Consistent Sleep: Dr. Michael Twery from the National Institutes of Health discusses how maintaining regular sleep patterns can reduce the risk of chronic diseases. (LINK)

 

Podcast

Huberman Lab: Dr. Matt Walker: The Biology of Sleep & Your Unique Sleep Needs